One Hour of Righteous Darkness

“Beyond a doubt truth bears the same relation to falsehood as light to darkness.”

Leonardo da Vinci

The people of United Earth demonstrated community March 28th at 8 PM in every time zone. The people were asked to participate in a voluntary black out for one hour. People were asked to turn off power not necessary to sustain human life.

From space, it appeared as if the lights were being dimmed one continent at the time as observers from the international space station looked down upon the beautiful garden world that is home to more than six billion citizens.
With the darkness came a still quietness and a slowing of human activity. For one moment of one hour, 60 minutes, 3600 seconds; the people of United Earth contemplated themselves, their thoughts of their lives, their loves, their families, the meaning of life.

Some enjoyed seductive moments to connect in the most intimate of ways like talking, seeing each other in candle light, enjoying great sex with the lights out; anything for the benefit of all humanity. Others stargazed, enjoyed favorite beverages and dreamed of a world at peace and prosperity where there is no war, no sex slave trade, no disease epidemics, no homelessness, no famine, and no illiteracy.

For one hour of righteous darkness, my wife Bonnie and I sat in a still calm quiet peace reflecting our 20 years together. We had sacrificed two of our favorite weekly sitcoms and the final minutes of he NCAA Tourney game between North Carolina and Louisville.

Our grandfather clock reminded us every time 15 minutes had passed and the hour seemed to be passing so quickly. We enjoyed the moment of shared thoughts of our travels, our children, and our grand children. We spoke of our yet unfolding dreams to be realized. The 30 minute and the 45 minute sound of the clock passed. We
breathed in the moment of shared temporal communion with all of Planet Earth. It felt good.

When the hour was becoming complete the calmest moment descended. The clock began it series of strikes to the hour; one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. It was 9 PM. The shared moment was complete. We enjoyed this experience and plan to spend more time sharing of one hour of righteous darkness. What did you do in the shared moment of darkness?

After The Tears

Heaven knows we need never be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts.

Charles Dickens

After the rain, the Earth is refreshed. Mother is calm, quiet, and still. The air is clear. It is time for peaceful reflection. It is a time of new beginning.

After the tears, the body is refreshed. Soul is calm, quiet, and still. Thoughts are clear. Focus is keen. It is time for peaceful reflection. Hope is reborn. It is a moment of new beginning.

Dreams like a Phoenix’s ashes come back to life. Goals are set. Plans are made. Life is going somewhere again.

The path to healing’s growth and development always involves pain. First, there is the admission and acceptance that our current miserable condition is unacceptable. Second, there is the pain of overcoming the familiar inertia that wants to keep us right where we are, miserable. Third, there is the pain of doing the work necessary to achieve personal healing. Healing is always personal because nothing is real until it is personal. Fourth, there is the pain to maintain your healing because the past will try to pull you back.

The path to healing always involves pain. Birth is a painful messy experience yielding great beauty that cannot adequately be described. When a new baby arrives crying, it is a moment of tears for mother, father, and child.

Mother and father are thankful. To the child, it is all new.

It will be the same with your healing. You have never been here before. It is all new. After your tears, your new life as a healed person will begin.

The Phoenix must burst into flame, die, and be reborn from its ashes; us too!
Questions

What will you do with your new life? It has been said the best time to plan for peace is during the time of war.

Will you wear new clothes?

Will you wear a new attitude?

How will you celebrate your healing?

How will you protect your healing?

Are you willing to give up who you are to become who you desire to be?

If your answer is yes, you are ready for your healing to begin.

The MISSION of 40 DAYS of HEALING is to provide you information that will help you get well and stay well physically and emotionally.

KEEP UP THE LOVE!

A Time To Cry

Tears are the silent language of grief.

Voltaire

It is probably is a good time to feel and experience the result of feeling. It is amazing how well humans have been designed. When our pain and our grief become too much to bear, we have a built safety valve to vent the weight of our souls looking for relief.

Pressure cookers were used where I grew up to can food to have on hand for winter. My mother would put quart jars inside the pressure cooker to seal in her investment. When the heat under the pressure cooker exceeded its capacity to hold heat inside, it would whistle and vent excess heat.

We, human beings, have internal sensors to accomplish the same thing. When our emotional pain has become more than we can bear, a valve opens and we cry. We cry tears unless our need to control is so excessive we do not allow ourselves the privilege.

What happens to a pressure cooker that can’t vent its excess heat? It explodes? What happens to a person who refuses the release of pain through crying tears?

First, they suffer the indignity of violent angry external outbursts, explosions, as it were at others who usually have nothing to do with their personal pain. Second, they suffer the unnecessary internal explosion of implosion. The pent up emotional energy is going somewhere. In either of these contexts, it is not in the interest of the person in pain.

It is believed that one of the attributes of the woman’s beauty is in the ability to cry easily. I honor the ability to accomplish the feat. In crying, the shedding of tears, a peaceful internal comfort is derived with the release of the pain.

I have learned over these many years that when my emotional pain becomes too great, I need to be smart enough to allow my system to do what it needs to do, to cleanse.

We can get well. We can heal but not without passing the way of tears.
Questions

Are you ready to be free of your emotional pain?

Do you need to cry away a lifetime’s pent up pain?

Have you ever noticed how much freer you breathe after a good cry?

Have you ever read poetry created in the bath of tears?

Are you ready to write some?

Are you ready to cry?

KEEP UP THE LOVE!

Help Comes When You Call

There is no love which does not become help.

Paul Tillich

Why is it that when people are drowning they have no problem calling out for help? They scream loud. HELP! HELP! There is no thought for who knows or who is looking.

Why is it when some of us need help we are too proud to ask for it? Is pride or the image of pride so important we had rather maintain our sickness or sick conditions than get the help we desperately need?

The man who is being beat up regularly by his wife or girlfriend may be too ashamed to let anyone know. The depressed person seldom calls out for help. The addicted seldom call out for help. The lonely seldom call out for help.

Is it that people (we) really enjoy suffering so much or is it that we are too afraid to expose our inadequacies thinking others will think less of us when we do? Or, are we so connected to our problems that we are unwilling to give them up? Is it possible our identities are so tied to our problems we wouldn’t know who we are without them?

If you could choose right now to experience total healing from the conditions that cause you suffering and make you miserable, would you? Could you step beyond your pride, fear, and shame enough to get better? If it were that easy you would probably have already taken action on your own.

Your desire for healing is a very necessary first step. Asking for help is next. Difficult steps follow. Disclosure is not optional. What you can do in the meantime is talk to someone you trust. It will be necessary to tell someone your concern.

Talk to someone. Talk to them now. Get the emotional weight off yourself. You were never meant to carry it alone. Let someone love you enough to help.
Questions

Are you now ready to totally disclose to another person the nature of your concern?

Are you ready to begin your healing by building the foundation of the person you desire to become?

Are you ready to allow someone else to help you carry your load?

Are you ready to love yourself to health?

The MISSION of Inspirations for HEALING is to provide you information that will help you get well and stay well physically and emotionally.

KEEP UP THE LOVE!

Accept Your Need To Heal

We cannot change anything until we accept it. Denial does not liberate, it oppresses.

C. G. Jung

Slavery is a deplorable condition that is unacceptable. It is still around even in the 21st Century. It lives on in the exploitation of women and children as sex slaves. It lives on as forced labor in some developing nations where it is yet acceptable to own other human beings and force them to serve against their will. It lives on in the victimization of the poor and elderly by people who mistreat them. Most civilized people regard this behavior as intolerably criminal.

What people living out enslaved experiences hope for above all is the privilege to be free, self - directing, and self – determining. Others amongst us live out the experience of slaves.

The woman who is regularly beaten by her husband or lover who does not recognize she has a choice lives out the life of a slave. Men, women, and children who live out lives of addiction may not have the personal power to make the choice to be free. Others are enslaved to debt, toxic relationships, poverty, sickness and disease. All live out their lives as slaves.

What conditions are you living in slavery to? What do you want to be free from? You can be free. Believe it!

Merriam – Webster’s Online Dictionary defines acceptance as the ability to recognize as true and take responsibility for. What condition do you need to recognize as true or accept personal responsibility for to be free to become the person you desire to be?

Do you need help to find the courage to deal with your demons that torture and enslave you? You can be free. Believe it!

Begin by accepting that your condition is real. Decide you are and will be responsible to getting the help you need to be free.

You are not alone. There are many who would offer you the loving encouragement you need to be successful in becoming free.

Your healing begins the moment you decide you are no longer willing to suffer. You can be free. You can begin your healing. Believe it. Start to make it happen!

Questions

Are you miserable because of conditions that make you feel powerless?

What conditions are you a slave to?

Are you ready to take the first step to freedom?

Do you love yourself enough to go for healing?

Let The Healing Begin, NOW!

For me, singing sad songs often has a way of healing a situation. It gets the hurt out in the open into the light, out of the darkness.

Reba McEntire

Merriam – Webster’s Online Dictionary reveals the word heal means to restore to original condition of health; physical and emotional. To heal is to care for, to doctor or minister to. It is to become healthy and strong again after illness or weakness, to recover from sickness, disease or injury, even those of the heart. To heal is to cure.

The words cancer, aids, leukemia, diabetes, kidney failure, liver or heart disease are dreaded when they are received as a personal diagnosis or the diagnosis of a close loved one. To many who hear the words, they sound like a death sentence while others take the words as a challenge to engage life to the fullest as never before.

Heartbreak, disappointment, anger issues, addictions, or painful experiences of abuse are the only conditions many know. Millions live with their pain for a life time without ever getting the healing help needed. Many never admit they need help. Living in denial is believed to be easier than bringing problems out in the open and getting help.

We all have scars on our personalities from personal pain we have experienced at the hands of people who said they loved us. What your/our fathers, mothers, siblings, friends, lovers or spouses did to you/us may indeed have caused extreme pain, physical and emotional. The question that must be answered in the present is how long we will allow past events dictate our present behavior and self – esteem in negative self – destructive ways not in our interests.

Wouldn’t NOW be a good time to mark the moment you are no longer willing to live with conditions and behavior that are killing you or persons close to your heart? Wouldn’t NOW be a good time to say no more, never again? Wouldn’t NOW be the time and the place to declare to the universe AND ONE PERSON your intent to heal?
If NOW is the time and you have declared your intent to the universe and one other person, then take the first step toward your new life. Know that you’re not alone. There are many of us walking towards healing. WE can do it, together. Let’s do it together. Come on! Let the healing begin, NOW!

Tin Cup Walks for The Cure

Cancer still kills and people still band together to demonstrate their faith the time comes when this insidious and indiscriminate disease will no longer be a threat to human life. Until that time comes, people walk, pray, fund, and lend their hopes to the discovery of a cure.

Two days ago, on February 23, 2008, hundreds trekked up South Mountain in Phoenix, Arizona celebrating 25 years of The American Cancer Society Annual Walk for The Cure. The walk was like a scene from Sly and The Family Stone’s Classic, “Everyday People.” There were long ones, short ones, big ones, small one, rounds one, black ones, white ones; they came all to demonstrate their love and care for friends and family lost to cancer and for friends and family affected NOW!

One of my colleagues, Tin Cup, not his real name, walked very early on Saturday before we met at the office for a few hours. I know why Tin Cup Walks. This is very real and personal for him.

Tin Cup’s Mother - in - Law passed away from Cancer last year. Her daughter Tin Cup’s wife is currently waging battle. She is affected, too.

Cancer still kills and yet its presence brings with it incredible moments of love and beauty. Tin Cup’s grand daughter knows more about Cancer than little ones might know. She recently saw a program on television that talked about people giving their hair for hair pieces that people who have lost their hair as a result of Cancer treatments can have hair. She talked it over with her mother, Tin Cup’s daughter who has lost a close friend to Cancer. She consulted with her grand father and her grand mother who blessed this little one’s heart of love. As a child, she was not only willing to talk about giving to others her down her back hair, she did it.

The American Cancer Society celebrated 25 years of the walk this year. When walkers returned from their experience, they were tagged with stickers that read, “I MADE IT TO THE TOP.”

Cancer still kills but not as many people as it used to. There is a strong spirit alive of HOPE in the many that have been affected by this condition of disease. Their indomitable spirit joined with friends and supporters are making a difference. You can too. Support The American Cancer Society. Together, we all make a difference.

Who and What Are You Attracting?

Can I talk to friends for a moment? I need to talk, maybe cry on your shoulders. I am not sure. I am sure I need and want to talk.

I dealt with some disappointments recently. I disappointed a friend. I made a commitment I couldn’t keep. I was responsible and accounted for my behavior.

Second, I worked with a group of women recently in a project. I get on well with women, but not this time. This experience didn’t end well. I was angry possibly because I didn’t get my way.

Third, recently Bonnie and I traveled for a weekend in Paradise when we heard an interview on NPR with legendary college basketball coach John Wooten. Coach Wooten’s teams won 10 NCAA Basketball championships. That’s more than any other.

When asked when his team started winning, he replied, “When we started winning”. The interviewer asked what changed to turn your program into a winning one.

Coach Wooten’s responded he continued to train his players as hard as he had when training facilities and funding were inadequate. When they won their first championship better players came to UCLA. The more they won the better players they attracted.

The light bulb came on. I took a moment to ask myself, “Oscar, who and what are you attracting?”

Fourth, when we arrived in paradise, we met a woman who owns hotels in Florida. She’s from Norway. We share a birthday March 27th. We talked. She told me she grew up near the beach.

Whenever she had an emotional issue to deal with, she went to the beach and wrote it in the sand and waited for the tide to wash it away. When the tide washed it away, she believed her issue had been resolved.

A second light comes on later when I see “The Secret”. I learned about the law of attraction and asked myself again, “Oscar, who and what are you attracting”?

I immediately put the law to work for me. In the three weeks to follow, I was invited for three speaking engagements. An interview went public on the web. People offer to help raise money for film projects.

I attract beautiful people who are blessing my life and work. My friend forgave me for disappointing her. Thanks for listening. I needed to talk. I appreciate you!

Who and what are you attracting?

Living Life Through The Pain of Love

Don't hold to anger, hurt or pain. They steal your energy and keep you from love.”

Anonymous

How long does it take to get over abuse? Should a person be over the affects of abuse in a month, a year, a lifetime? What about an entire culture? How long should it take a culture to get over abuse?

How long should it take a woman to get over the experience of incest, rape, or domestic violence? How long should it take a child to get over the violence of adults who didn’t know how to love? Why do people who are supposed to love and care cause so much pain?

Bonnie St. John reports of a woman whose father used her for sex until she was 15. When he stopped, she wondered what she did wrong. How long should it take for her to get herself together and no longer be affected by what happened?

How long should it take men and women who fight in wars to get over the affects and horrors of war; a month, a year, a lifetime? How long does it take to get over abuse?

Ancestors of African Americans were forced to serve as sex slaves, field slaves, and domestic slaves for more than 240 years prior to the Emancipation Proclamation of January 1, 1863 by the 16th President of The United States, Abraham Lincoln. Another 100 years would pass before legislation would affect civil rights for African Americans. Some ask African Americans, “Can’t you just get over it?”

Are you living life through the pain of love right now? Are you tired of carrying the weight of your pain and not being able to get it out so you can work on getting help? How long do you intend to suffer through the pain of love working very hard to keep secret the abuses of a lifetime hoping no one will ever find out? If you are one struggling hard to keep your primary personal pain a secret, it is time to stop and take a page out of the 12 Step Programs Big Book.

People working recovery systems know for them to get well, it is necessary to talk out secrets and self destructive behavior, come clean and turn the light on to opportunity to work on getting better. There’s hope. You can get better.

Get All The Love You Want

Get All The Love You Want When You Give Away The Love You Need.

“O”



How many people do you know that say they are looking for love? How many people do you know who wouldn’t know love if love nibbled at their ear, kissed them on the cheek and whispered, “I heard you’re looking for me?”

It seems like most of us most of the time have the desire for the fix or the fulfillment of our idea of love. My hopes are that your relationships make your heart, soul, mind, and body sing so much that your aura screams, “YES!” and you want to bust out with a giggle or a loud laugh for how good you got it. Feels good; no it’s ecstatic, isn’t it? This is love at one of its highest spiritually sexual and sexually spiritual moments. This love is good and is so much more.

Here’s a strategy gifted to you that will dramatically enhance your love life. All of us want the good stuff. A lot of us have discovered when we got to the good stuff too fast; the good stuff did not last. This strategy gifted to you will make getting to the good stuff a sweeter process that gets better.

Whatever it is of love that you need most, not want most, find a way to give it away. Giving always produces results just like planting seed. Giving away what you need is like sowing seeds to grow a flower garden.

When you want to experience love and beauty, then you must create experiences of love and beauty and give them away for many others to experience. When you have done this, the process will have been engaged. Don’t stop when you start giving. Keep on giving. The more you give away the love in your heart, the more you grow a garden of beauty, a garden of love; just like the patch of Earth you give the seed to will later give you a patch of Earth covered in beautiful flowers.

Since what you sow grows and what you give away grows, plant what you want to grow. You want to grow love, plant seeds of love by giving away most what you need and want for yourself.

When you have developed this loving, giving, and planting spirit; you will have become the lover, the one to be desired and pursued. Now, you have a new set of opportunities. You have choice.

A Life Saving Procedure

My 73 year old mother had colon cancer. A portion of her colon was removed last year. I’m thankful my mother is doing well and living her full life.

My mom encouraged me to have the colonoscopy procedure. I am 50, black, and need to minimize my health risks.

OK. I describe the experience palatably. Tuesday, January 29, 2008 was the day to clean my colon by eating no food, taking four tablets at 9 AM of an initial cleansing agent, and drinking a gallon of clear liquid for two hours. I now love beef bouillon.

At 2 PM, I engage the second round of cleansing agent. I drink a gallon of salty tasting liquid, 8 ounce portions every 15 minutes until it’s gone. By this time, I am a frequent flyer to a certain household location.

Today, Wednesday, January 30, 2008, was the day. I experienced some anxiety about this. I arrived on time, got undressed, gowned, robed, and sat with a group of men lined up like airliners on a tarmac waiting for their turn to take off.

The next phase is prep. I get stuck for an IV. The first one missed and had to call a back up. Then they wheel me to the door by the room the procedure will take place.

All of you who are getting to know me realize I have a deep love, respect and appreciation for women. So, why does this little fine woman step up to my bed and say, “Mr. Crawford, my name is Dr. Matthews. I will be doing your procedure today.”

Hoover Dam!

I was rolled in and positioned and given the joy juice shot. I told the team working with her I had a silly question I wanted to raise when the procedure is complete. They wanted me to ask then. I needed to wait.

Then the little that little pretty woman put twelve feet of hose with a camera on the end into my body. I watched the camera feed. I have a clean colon with no polyps.

When it was over, I asked, “Do gay men tolerate this procedure better than straight men?” I wasn’t joking. I really wanted to know.

Bottom Line, encourage the people in your life 50 and older to have this life saving procedure. I got it done. I’m thankful for the positive report and so is my family.

Keep Up the Love!

Oscar Crawford

Hope For and Dream For

Presidential Candidate Barack Obama’s platform for change is premised upon the idea of hope. What is hope?

Hope is wishing for something with expectation of its fulfillment. Rev. Jesse Jackson, former presidential candidate continues to preach, “Keep Hope Alive!”

I believe I saw hope alive yesterday while in Tuscon, Arizona. My wife and I attended worship with friends at the Midvale Park Seventh – Day Adventist Church.

Pastor Ronald Yabut, a Filipino American preached from biblical texts and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s speech, I Have a Dream. His presentation was passionate. He appealed to people to embody the attributes of love, good character, and service. He echoed the words of Dr. King, “I Have a Dream”.

As I looked around the congregation, it was 21st Century America, a microcosm of Earth’s global community. Whites were present in an apparently shrinking majority partnered with men and women from other cultural groups in marriage and congregational life.

Cross cultural marriages in many contexts were present. A meal was shared at the conclusion of worship the minister and his family were present for.

A primary initiative of Crawford and Dienst is to bring people together who might never otherwise have opportunity to meet. We assert ourselves as the prompt. For years, we have celebrated birthdays inviting people who are different by color, culture, class, or condition. On this Sabbath, there was not work for us. We were the invited ones.

Hope is alive at Midvale Park without the prompts of political movements and so is the dream of MLK. Remember to Keep Hope Alive and the Dream.

Hope for and dream for the time when people will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. Hope for and dream for the time when America will be an oasis for freedom and for justice. Hope for and dream for the time when we will live out the American idea that all are created equal and endowed by the Creator with certain inalienable rights and among these; life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Each of us and all of us can make a difference. We can help make this dream a reality everyday, one day at a time.

Keep up The Love Everybody. When you’re in Tuscon on Saturday, bless yourself and visit with the great people at the Midvale Park Seventh – Day Adventist Church.

“O”

Give Thanks for Unanswered Prayers

Garth Brooks sings a song called Unanswered Prayers when he remembers a woman he loved and wanted when he was in high school so bad he hurt inside. Years later, he saw her and was thankful his prayers had gone unanswered. His fantasy was gone.

Earlier today, I thought of others like you and me, I am sure are thankful things didn’t go their way. First, Emily (not her real name) was on her way to Guyana to join family members of The People’s Temple. Running late, she missed her plane. Disgusted and disappointed, news arrived to Emily that members of the People’s Temple in Jonestown Guyana had all participated in a mass suicide. Emily was thankful for unanswered prayers.

Second, Jerry (not his real name) was at war in Vietnam. One morning before sunrise while sleeping in a bunker with his unit, Jerry heard his wife’s voice say, “Get up and go outside.”

He got up and walked out. As soon as he cleared the bunker, a bomb hit it and killed everybody inside. He fell to his knees and later put in a call to his wife to let her know he was OK.

Another time, Jerry’s on a helicopter mission with his team. He hears his wife’s voice say, “Lean Forward.” As he leans forward, the soldier next to him is hit. Later, Jerry falls to his knees and then calls his wife.

After Vietnam, Jerry continues his federal government service. On April 19, 1995, Jerry wakes up a bit frustrated with his wife because he has over slept. All she could say was she believed she should let him sleep a little longer that morning. Jerry gets up, gets dressed, and gets on his way to work still frustrated because he will be late.

One block from work Jerry hears an explosion. The ground shakes. The Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City has been bombed. Jerry immediately returns home to hold his wife.

Today, I invite you to join me in taking time to give thanks for unanswered prayers and not getting the many things we wanted that were not in our. I am thankful for you and the privilege to connect with you this way. You are loved and very much appreciated.

Live Well and Love Well My Beautiful Friends and Loved Ones Like You Are Running Out Of Time. You Really Are.

LOVE HAPPENS!!! This Time Angelica Antonio!

Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.
Heb 13:2


7:00 AM The conference would convene in Tokyo in less than 36 hours, many of which I would lose through the time zones. It was snowing in New York. My plane out of Ohio had been delayed. Flights in to JFK had been suspended. It was going to be a very long day.

11:00 AM JFK is open. I board the plane in Ohio at exactly the time my connecting flight was departing for Juneau, Alaska and on to Seoul, South Korea.

It was noon when I arrived in The Big Apple. Since I missed my original flight, I had twelve hours on my hands to see New York.

I bussed, trained, and dif the subway all over the city. I’d been on subways in Athens, Greece before, but it was nothing like the subway in New York. Every representative of humanity was there. I was pleased Mother Nature had a plan in mind of her own for me that day.

I saw the city from JFK to Brooklyn, Times Square to Statue of Liberty. I stood where what is now Ground Zero in New York. I had stood between the World Trade Center buildings at ground level looking up.

I have heard it said that ancient Hebrews said God was a mountain with a cloud at the top. Some of God can be seen. Some of God can never be seen. That’s what it felt like. It had been overcast and I could not see to the top of the buildings.

Just before 1 AM, a Korean Air Lines 747 with hundreds on board departed JFK. I was seated on the aisle. Seated in the row with me were a Korean businessman and a nurse on her way to the Philippines.

It was late. There was much on my mind about my coming experience in Japan and Korea. I intended to sleep to avoid thinking about it. As I closed my eyes, I heard a voice.

“Excuse me”, it said.

My eyes were closed. I did not respond. Whoever it was could not want my attention.

Then, I felt a touch. I opened my eyes.

The nurse wants to talk. I am tired and not particularly impressed.

Her name is Anjelica Antonio. She is so persistent, the man between us insists one of us change seats with him so he can sleep.

For the next five hours, she talks. When she tires, she slips her arm inside mine, looks up at me with beautiful sleepy eyes, yawns, finds a comfortable position for her head against me and proceeds to go to sleep.

I couldn’t sleep. Besides the conference waiting for me in Tokyo, I now have another spin going on in my head.

3:30 AM Pacific Standard Time

We land in Alaska. Everybody must get off the plane. It will be refueled and cleaned. There are two hours to reboarding. I am sure what has been an interesting moment will have concluded.

I get off the plane and go about my business. In the line at the food court, there is a tug at my elbow. If I weren’t so preoccupied with the reason I am traveling, I could enjoy this, and it occurs to me I may have no choice.

I am a Minister of the Gospel by calling. I am on my way to Japan to meet with more than 1,000 ministers to study the Church in Japan and Korea.

I realized more may have happened from New York to Alaska than I thought when it dawned upon me that God might be answering my prayer. I had prayed for God to send a wife. I also wanted her to be a nurse.

From Alaska to Tokyo, I spent little time thinking about the 747 just like this one that had been shot down just a week before by Russian MIG fighter jets. By the time we landed in Tokyo, I did not look forward to saying goodbye to Anjelica.

We had a couple of hours together in Tokyo before she had to leave to Manila. When it was time for her to go, it was emotional. In sync, our lips reached for each other’s. I leaned over as she reached up and a moment of shared love was eternally sealed.

I watched her walk away. I felt sad as if a part of myself was going with her. Part of me wished all of me was.

Love is its own power. It appears at times and in places unannounced. The wise will be ready.

The Hebrew text is powerful. Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels (Anjelicas) unawares.

Father: Bless your children to always be wise and always be ready for love. Amen

Do You Know Vivian Abe?

Do you know Vivian Abe (AHH - BAY)? Tell her I search for her. I really want to see her to ask her forgiveness.

In a taverna on the Island of Crete, I met her. She showed up and sat by me. I tried to ignore her, but she wanted to talk.

Do you know Vivian Abe? I search for her.

I tried to be polite. I just waited for the moment to pass. As she left, she slipped me a napkin under my hand. When she had gone, I opened it. It said,

No one I know
perceives the love
I have inside.
Please come!
Please come!

Do you know Vivian Abe? Tell her I search for her.

The next year was an evolving love. We traveled Greece and Turkey. We flew. We sailed. We loved. At year’s end, Vivian had the opportunity to pursue a graduate degree in creative writing in San Francisco. When I think back, this was the moment I became a writer.

Do you know Vivian Abe? I search for her.

30 days later, I flew across the world to see her. I missed her. I loved her. I wanted to be where she was.

The night before my return to Greece, we were drunk of love on a bearskin rug by the fire listening to Isaac Hayes’ Hot Buttered Soul when she brought up the "M" word. I wasn’t mature enough to admit I wasn’t thinking marriage. I should’ve. I didn’t. I haven’t seen Vivian since.

I know I can't make up for the pain I caused. I can ask for forgiveness. I really want to see Vivian, talk, and learn all she’s accomplished in 35 years. I have commissioned others to help me find her and now I commission you. Find her and you will be rewarded.

Do you know Vivian Abe? Tell her I search for her.

If you still have some unfinished business in your life that you need to take care of, then get busy. Love yourself and others enough to take care of your business. It is the adult and loving thing to do.

Just so you will know, this is a true story. I am looking for Vivian Abe

Love somebody this week that needs and wants to be loved by you.

Love and Blessing to YOU all!

"O"